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The Watch

We are quickly approaching Anniston's first birthday. I can't believe it has almost been a year since she entered our lives.

Not only is March Anniston's first birthday but it is also the anniversary of Eli not sleeping in his bed all night long.

It's been a loooong year in that regards.

There have been times this year where I thought I wouldn't be able to make it through the day because I was so tired. Between Annie getting up all night for her buffet (me) and Eli's knees in my back I was exhausted.

I even purchased a sleep training book which is another notch in my "I should never say never" belt. But I was desperate and the book promised it would get my child to sleep in his own bed all  night….as long as he was five years old and under. Apparently if your kid is six and older and still not sleeping all night you're just screwed. 

I'll let you know what the book says once I decide to read it.  My life has become sad in the fact that I now put Netflix before books. Even sleep training books. I put the book next to me in bed thinking maybe it if Eli came to bed at night and saw the book he would remember he needed to stay in his bed all night and he would go back to his room. But that didn't work either. 

One afternoon several months ago Eli said he wanted a watch....not just any watch but a Polar Express watch. Which really was no surprise because he wants Polar Express everything these days. 

At this point I saw an opening and I took it.  I may not be smart enough to read a sleep training book but I'm definitely not too dumb to let a moment like this pass me by. I told him if he started sleeping in his bed all night I would get him that watch. You should know two things...

1. I am not above bribery in parenting. Especially in parenting.

2. I really didn't put much thought into it because I thought there was no way he would do it. We were going on a YEAR of him coming into our bed every night. How powerful could one watch be? 

I forgot we were dealing with the power of the Polar Express here. 

The next morning I woke up to Eli walking in my room proudly proclaiming "I get my polar express watch now!!"

It caught me off-guard, not Eli walking in my room but instead the full night of sleep. Once you've been gone from something for so long you don't even remember what it's like. Both my children slept all night on the same night. I'm pretty sure that's close to winning the lottery.

I then allowed myself to wake up a little more and checked to make sure Annie was alive (because that's what you do when a baby wakes up multiple times a night forever and then one night sleeps all night.) I realized Eli had indeed slept in his bed all night and I had Luke on the other side of me giving me a "good luck finding that watch" look.

We made a big deal about Eli sleeping in his bed all night (you know to make sure he did it again) and I told him to do it again and I would get the watch.

Again, I'm thinking this was a fluke deal, a one night thing.

And the next night he slept in his bed all night and asked if I had his watch yet.

Unfortunately there was a flaw in my plan....There is no Polar Express watch in existence. I searched the internet high and low and couldn't find one.

I'm thinking most kids forget about Polar Express between the months of Mid January to December. Not my child. It's all Polar Express all year. He is already asking for a Polar Express birthday cake even though he had a PE birthday cake last year.

It feels a little redundant to have the same cake theme two years in a row, but then I remember he isn't on pinterest to know that these things aren't acceptable now days so I'm planning a Polar Express esque birthday party. In March.

Anyways, I told Eli that I would look for that watch for him, but since that time he has started coming back to our bed. I still plan to find him some sort of watch, but he has since forgotten about the PE watch. Which is probably for the best because again, IT DOESN'T EXIST.

Now, do you want to hear something really freaky? And a little crazy. Those days when Eli slept in his own bed I got a little sad. SAD.

Being a mom is the weirdest thing in the world. One minute you are praying for more sleep, crying because you are so tired, and the next moment you are crying because your kid is getting older and didn't come into your bed to elbow you in the face all night. Just bizarre.

And I feel like that is the definition of my journey in motherhood. I go through moments of frustration.....

"Is it time for Luke to be home yet"
"I am so ready to be done breastfeeding"
"When will I sleep a full night again"

And then moments of

"the days are going by too quickly"
"breastfeeding has been such a wonderful journey I don't want it to end"
"I love these middle of the night visits with my babies"

Nobody told me that when I became a mother I would also experience a bit of multiple personalities. But I guess it comes with the territory.

I also didn't realize the great lengths I would go to to support my child's obsession.....I've contemplated making a Polar Express watch, but then I remember I don't know how to make a watch so I scratch that and start brainstorming again.

I know one day Eli will sleep in his bed all night and one day Annie won't be nursing anymore and will sleep all night and then I will get a full nights sleep. It will happen one day. And as tired as I am I will probably miss these nights of elbows in my face.  However I will probably still be looking for that polar express watch.


  1. I love that he is so stuck on the polar express! (My boys stuck on his truck movie...knows all the words and songs and can tell me more about trucks than my truck driving brother-in-law!) It's funny the things you miss when you least expect it! (and if you can buy a big cheap plastic watch you can carefully lift the plastic face, and the hands up and put a polar express sticker over the dial and write the numbers on....i may have done this myself when i was younger and desperate for a non-exisitant Jem and the Holograms watch...)

  2. This watch is like what the conductor has, maybe this would work?!?


    What about this?

  4. You could do a customization watch and use a pic from Polar Express?

  5. I love this. And I can so relate to the sad part. I think only a mom could fully understand.

  6. Hi Megan! My little guy just turned four yesterday and many of the experiences you have with Eli happen with us too! Including the sleep battle :-( It's hard to function without enough sleep!! I finally broke down and got him an "Okay to Wake" type clock for his room. My friend uses one for her daughter (also 4 years old) and it works like a charm for them so after MANY failed attempts with various bribes on my own we decided to bite the bullet and get the dang clock. Well turns out it does work! He knows to stay in his bed/room until the clock turns green! Who knew something so easy would work!??!?! So he went from coming into our bed in the middle of the night EVERY night to sleeping in his bed and waiting in his room in the morning until the clock turns green. I don't get how this worked when NOTHING else did but I'll take it! Here is the link to the one we bought if you think this may work for your fam too:
    I hope this helps!! And don't worry you WILL sleep through the night again someday - I promise! :-)

  7. I love people are already on top of finding a watch for you :)

    We got lucky - our grandson wanted a watch so bad & he was so happy with an Avengers one. Whew - I guess we escaped a argument there :)

    Oh, I think the older they get, the more things you'll miss that you never thought :)

  8. My TWO year old still wakes up to nurse probably 50% of the time. Luckily my 5 1/2 year old only gets up once a month or so and b/c he either wet the bed or had a bad dream. It's super easy to get him back in his bed too. But I hear you about not enough sleep! We're in an apartment right now while building a house so as much as I want to let Drew (2 year old) cry it out because HELLO, SHE's TWO I figure that isn't fair to the neighbors!

  9. Can you put Polar Express stickers on a watch?

  10. I so love reading your blog!
    I found a cute Polar Express stopwatch, like the one the conductor has in the movie.

  11. Love this post.. Not much else to say except I get it..


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