No Talking Necessary

If you follow me on Twitter then you already know that yesterday I had a traumatic experience.

It was awful.

I was at the gym and I wanted to weigh myself.

Well I should back up, I say I was at the gym like I was working out. Actually our church is connected to a gym so I have free and easy access to their scales whenever I want.

I'm not sure if I have free and easy access to the gym equipment. I have never asked for fear that I would have free and easy access and then I would feel convicted to start working out.

I'm all about avoiding conviction.

So in order to figure out just how much weight I have gained since I got married I ventured over to the dreaded territory to step on the scale.

When you can't get your wedding ring off your finger anymore, you know something is happening in the weight department.

And it ain't going down.

So after church was over and everybody was fellowshipping (is that a word) I snuck over without anybody looking.

It was do or die time.

I got in the gym and found the nearest scale, it was one of those stand up ones that you use at the Dr.'s office.

I was not about to stand on it and fiddle back and forth with that metal piece until I found the appropriate weight.

I wanted accuracy and I wanted it NOW.

So I found a black scale sitting on the ground, it seemed perfect.

I tapped it with my foot and it AUDIBLY said: Please Step On.

I was a little taken back by a talking scale, but the woman sounded so polite and I thought, there was no way this thing was going to announce my weight. Surely it would just greet me, allow me to do my business and then tell me goodbye.

SURELY it would not mention any details in between.

Oh friends, the polite lady inside of that scale betrayed me like I have never been betrayed before.

She vocalized the numbers on that scale loud and clear.

As if I couldn't read them and wasn't traumatized by them enough.

I can read ma'am. Thank you very much.

I actually screamed when she announced the numbers. It scared me for those numbers to be spoken out loud.

I came home and looked up this scale online. I wanted to know what on earth would possess somebody to own one of these.

I mean most people who weigh themselves cover up the numbers so nobody can see them. Why would they want them shouted for all the world to hear?

I found out that the scales are intended for those who cannot see very well (or at all). Which made total sense to me and then made me feel bad for doubting the use of these very sweet machines.

But it did leave me with two questions.

1. Why would the gym have this scale out and about disguised as a 'normal' scale

2. WHY DOES IT NOT COME WITH A WARNING LABEL!?!?!?

The sweet but deceiving culprit: